What Is Your Purpose?

 

Life is full of transitions. We grow up. We grow older. Hopefully in the midst of it all, we even grow a little wiser. We face challenges and battles; some expected and some not. I often wish I had a crystal ball that could clue me in on what I am supposed to be doing, when I should be doing it, and what the ultimate goal and outcome will be. It's mind-boggling when I think of the time and effort I put in to projects, never knowing if I am ultimately making a difference or even on the right path.

 

I know many people who have struggled after a divorce or the death of a loved one. They felt lost for a long time and tried to figure out what their new identity looked like now that they were 'one' instead of  'two'. I've seen some college graduates wander aimlessly after graduation, with their diploma in hand, trying to discern what they would do next and where they would go. Life is full of questions.

 

We look around. We assume we know what direction we are heading. We hope we know what our future holds. Sometimes, though, what we are meant to do finds us when we aren't looking for it. We're so busy focusing on the bigger picture that sometimes we don't see what is right in front of us.

 

We should ask ourselves WHY we think we want something. Is it our head or our heart leading us? Maybe we should be more open to the possibilities. Life is full of them. The right job, relationship, and project will come along. By nature, we are impatient. We want to know the WHO, the WHAT, the WHERE, the WHY, and the WHEN. We don't like to wait and we certainly don't like to guess what is coming next. How can we be expected to be ready or do our best if we are surprised?

 

So what do we do? We hold on to hope and faith. The hope is something that gives our mind reassurance. The faith is something that reassures our heart and soul. Ultimately God knows the plan and will clue us in on the details when the time is right. Knowing that we are never alone is reassurance of the biggest kind, that's where we'll find our drive and our strength to face the uncertainties.

 

How do you stay focused and on track with your goals and clarifying what your purpose is?

It Takes Time For A Change To Transition Into A New Norm

Right now we are in full swing of the holidays. We've shopped, we've wrapped, we've stood in lines, we've baked and cooked, and we've socialized. We've made it through Christmas Eve and Christmas Day and now it is the morning after. We're relaxing, we've attempted to tidy up our houses to regain a little bit of order. We will undoubtedly eat leftovers for the next few days until the time comes when someone cries out, 'I need a hamburger; no more ham, PLEASE.'

During the holidays, including up through New Years, we try to catch up with friends and neighbors, and have family gatherings. For some, the holidays have looked a little different this year. I know it has in our house. We had a wonderful Christmas Eve dinner, if I do say so myself, but it was still different. In years past we played host to a larger extended family or close friends, but this year it was just 3 of us. We prepared the same dishes, decorated the house, went to a candlelight worship service, and watched Christmas movies on the couch. We missed having our whole immediate family here with us, but we understand that life changes; kids get married, start families of their own, and start new traditions (that perhaps do not mesh with ours). A family member passed this year and wasn't part of our holiday routine, and another family member is now in a nursing care facility which created yet another change.

The 3 of us slept in on Christmas morning and went through the rest of our day at a slower, more meandering sort of speed. Now it is Monday and we are all feeling a little lost. We have a couple of days off and want to make the most of them, but also aren't sure what to do. I do not have the desire, nor the energy yet today, to go shopping. I may do a little bit of Internet research for the best way to spend a gift card and perhaps venture out on Wednesday, lol.

The thing is, there is A LOT of hype that gets us up to the holiday (holiday music on the radio for one), but nothing that tells us what to do the 'morning after'. This morning my husband told me he saw one of our neighbors already taking their outdoor lights down. What? Seriously? I'm not ready to go that far. We have an entire year in between the holidays; meaning that a lot of change can take place during those 12 months. Relationships can change, for good or bad. Families can become bigger; we may have added spouses or new babies. As our small corner of the world changes, so do our traditions and the way we do things to make life special. Changes can happen literally overnight, just ask someone who has lost someone unexpectedly. In order for changes to become the new normal, though, we will need time. Thankfully, there is no time limit for a change to transition into a new norm. It won't happen over night. We'll have old memories to consider and new memories to create.

So, first off, how was your Christmas? What made it special? What was new about it? What, if anything, changed for you?

What are you doing today on this 'day after'? What does the rest of your week look like? Anyone that knows me well knows that I am a planner, a scheduler extraordinaire. I worked at a frenzied pace the entire week before Christmas and now I have a little time off. I could be curling up with a book, watching a movie, or sitting in my retreat room facing my laptop (oh wait, that's exactly what I'm doing right now). The point is I still feel a bit lost. When you're always used to your calendar being full you suddenly aren't sure what to do with an open slot; sorry if that sounds as pathetic as it presently looks on my laptop screen.

What is my big point today? Only that if you've experienced a big change this year (or even a small one) that has you feeling a little out of sorts and a little lost, that's okay. Take as much time as you need to face those changes head on, to try to understand them better, to appreciate and digest them, and to learn to accept them for what they are (or aren't). Given the right amount of time, your changes will transition into your new norm. Your holiday, this year or next, can be whatever you want it to be.

There Is Life After Transitions

Transitions can sometimes be tricky. People will always perceive them differently. Some are good; some not so good. A transition can be a lot like a journey. You have to head down the road; some roads will be bumpy depending on which route you choose. A transition is about getting from one place to another or moving past something. A journey is very similar. It gets you from one place to another, but often takes longer and unexpected things happen and change the path along the way. With a journey we may think we know where we're heading, but the destination can transform and change on the way (sometimes in the blink of an eye).

Many people are faced with transitions every day, often not by choice. You may have experienced a divorce and find yourself transitioning back to being a single person. You may have fought an illness and found yourself transitioning from being sick to being whole again; or as whole as you can now be. You may have lost your job and are trying to understand and transition into whatever tomorrow will look like. Or maybe you lost a loved one and are transitioning to a new life with the feeling of a broken heart making it hard to get through today.

Some transitions won't be as hard though. Sometimes they may start out feeling that way; we'll feel increased anxiety, we'll feel unsure, and we'll feel pressured but then the journey helps us to discover new and better things. We all get comfortable, sometimes even too comfortable. Like the seasons, we need to change. We anticipate the seasons (all four of them). We expect them. We know when they're coming and know what they'll feel like, but often many of us still have a difficult time transitioning from one into the next (especially going from autumn to winter). By the time February arrives many are seeking warmer temperatures and sunnier skies. In their own way they try to rush the season, but the reality is that nature needs to take its course.

Some teens transition to being young adults with more grace than others. Many adults transition into retirement better. Sadly, a lot of elderly have a difficult time transitioning through the process of getting older.

Yes, some transitions present themselves to us and we're expected to just know how to handle them. Not necessarily fair, but a reality nonetheless. The better news is ... we'll try to get through whatever transitions we need to. We may not know what the 'LIFE' after a transition will look like (other than different), but the important thing to remember is that there IS life after transitions.

What transition are you currently facing?

What Is It About Change?

For every person who talks about change being a 'good' thing there will be someone standing right next to them who claims that change is 'bad'. So we ask ourselves, 'What is it about CHANGE that intimidates us? Or excites us? Or scares us? Or invigorates us?'

Change and transitions could be considered the same. We all have different seasons in our lives. Nothing is ever the same forever, and I'm not sure that I'd want it to be. There are those changes that we can predict and count on; growing up and growing older, growing wiser through experience, perhaps getting married, or even becoming a parent or a grandparent. These are all good changes. But you can take any good change and either embrace it or run from it. Most changes will come with choices. We always have some level of choice; how we want to interpret things and how we want to handle them.

 

I read a devotional the other day on the topic of change and it mentioned there being changes that make you want to shout for joy and other changes that make you want to run and hide. So, yes, I suppose some change can be good and some can be bad, BUT even the bad can contain some good. Ask anyone who has battled an illness or a breakup or has a lost a job. It may have been a devastatingly bad change at a particular time in their life, but time heals many wounds. Over time people may have become smarter or wiser or stronger because of what they went through. Life teaches us lessons if we are willing to be the student.

 

Whatever you do, don't let someone else define what change is for you. Only you can decide if it'll be good or bad. Only you get to decide how it will shape you and what you will take away from it.

 

What's been a recent change in your life? Did you get engaged? Did you become a parent? Did you become an empty nester? Did you change careers?

 

How's it going?

Transitions Aren't Always Easy

Do you ever feel like a sailboat that has a ripped sail? One minute you're smoothly gliding along the water with the sun gleaming down from overhead and then next minute you have a rip in your sail and your boat is forced to switch directions? Whether you have a boat or not, just about everyone experiences that feeling at one time or another. The bigger question is: How do you handle it? Do you go with the flow (pardon the pun) and be adaptable or do you let the obstacle stop you dead in your tracks?

Not all transitions are going to be smooth. Life throws us all kinds of challenges every day. If they were easy and avoidable they wouldn't be called challenges. We're all human and we experience things like separation, sickness, loneliness, debt, stress, and doubt. I like to think that God never gives me more than I can handle. Obstacles and challenges can often be thought of as character tests. Maybe God is testing our faith or maybe we're testing our own strength and character. Maybe we need to dig deep and see just what we're made of.

Whatever your challenge or transition is today how are you coping with it? Are you making progress? Do you need some help or someone to talk with? Maybe your week is going great (and I hope it is); but take a minute and look around you. How is your spouse or your child or your neighbor getting along? Do they seem to be mulling something over? Maybe just asking them how their week is going is all they need to let them know they're not alone.