Showing posts with label dealing with frustration. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dealing with frustration. Show all posts

Wednesday, October 11, 2017

Tipping The Scale

Life is all about balance, or at least that's what most of us strive for. We wake up in the morning and we anticipate what our day will bring. What will our To Do list look like? How much will we actually accomplish? What relationships will take center stage today and need our attention? What unexpected drama will we be faced with? Who will push our buttons and allow us to feel stressed? Or will we get through our day and feel accomplished and at peace?

Whew ... that's a lot of what ifs and scenarios that will most likely get played out in a 12-14 hour period of time. 

On our best days we think we'll be able to tackle anything that comes our way. Everyone faces unexpected bumps in their path, but it is how we are able to deal with them that matters most and defines our character and our strength. While I feel it is good to start our day with a general plan and a goal, it would be unrealistic to think that plans can't and won't be changed (whether we are in agreement with them or not). To ultimately get through any day we need to be able to go with the flow and tell ourselves that it is okay if we don't get through the daily list because tomorrow is a new day and we can try again.

We try to keep a handle on life and we try to keep our heads above water. Some days we are able to succeed better than others. Some days we are weary from treading. 

What tips the scale for you? What throws you off balance and challenges your strength?

  • a lack of sleep? (I totally get this one. I am an insomniac most nights.)
  • a crying baby in public that distracts you from your moments of peace? (The grandma in me wants to go and help, but sometimes it is wise not to butt in.)
  • a honking horn from an impatient driver while sitting in traffic?
  • politics and the media? (in general)
  • people who swear in public?
  • people who smoke outside, but directly in front of a door to a restaurant or business that you need to walk through to get to your destination?

Everyone has their triggers; the things that tip the scale for them and throws them off their stride. When that happens ... and it will ... what do you do to regain your balance? Do you choose to ignore whatever inconvenienced you? Do you immediately become defensive? Do you respond or choose to keep quiet and keep your feelings to yourself?

There is the old saying that we should think before we speak (sort of a take off of 'measure twice, cut once'). Always best not to react right away; but rather observe, then think, then decide if you want to fight that battle. I've always stressed that once words are out (good or bad), you cannot take them back.

The next time your scale has been tipped and you find yourself off balance, take a deep breath and think about the most constructive way to get back to where YOU want to be. Be part of the solution rather than a new problem for someone else.

Thursday, August 7, 2014

Where Is Your Faith?


Do you ever find yourself facing one of those ‘frustrating’ days. The kind that make you feel overwhelmed, antsy, and agitated? You’re not alone. Many people feel this way at some point. It doesn’t mean it’s entirely your fault or often can’t even be avoided. Sometimes you just have days when you feel like the stars aren’t aligned. Your day can start out by spilling coffee on your blouse or having someone cut you off in traffic. You may get a deadline unexpectedly moved up at work or have an unpleasant confrontation with a stranger. Sometimes these things just happen, but hopefully not too often.
 
When you find yourself facing a day like that what’s your first response? To become defensive? To become angry? To try to fix everything (which I find can be the most exhausting)?

Every once in a while I face a day like this. I guess that just makes me normal. I’m fortunate though to have some great people around me for support; my family, my friends, and my co-workers. I’ll be honest and say that sometimes the little things can frustrate me as much as the big things. It’s my nature to play the peacekeeper, to want be able to re-align the stars, and to get everything and everyone back to running smoothly. Truth be told if I could really manage to accomplish all that I’d be giving myself WAY too much credit.

I need to accept that there are things out of my control (ok … MANY things). Everything is in God’s hands. Maybe He is presenting me with a frustrating day now and then to teach me something. To teach me to be more understanding, or to have more patience, or to turn some of my stress over to Him. I’ve always had a hard time doing that. It’s not that I don’t have faith, because I do. I think it’s because I was raised to try to be self-sufficient and independent. For me to stand back and ‘turn it over to God’, in my mind, makes me think I’m taking the easy way out – that I’m not doing my share and am standing back waiting for Him to take care of my life for me. In my heart I know that isn’t the case; I should be asking God for support and accomplish my tasks and tackle my stresses with Him by my side, BUT my head tells me to keep trying to handle everything myself. Absurd, I know.  So right after I master re-aligning the stars I’ll get started on figuring out how to align my heart and my mind.

Any suggestions? How do you handle your frustrating days?