Hold Tight To HOPE

It's the Christmas season; a time for family and friends, making memories, laughing, and buying someone that one special gift that will make them tear up with joy. For many though it is also a time of stress, family chaos, and often mourning and loneliness.

In a time when carols are playing on the radio and outdoor lights are twinkling in the neighborhoods, there's also a lot of tragedy in the world. Just this week I've heard stories of unthinkable situations; shootings of innocent children, beatings, robberies, and hostage taking. So how do we hold on to HOPE when so many destructive obstacles are being thrust into our paths? If I had the absolute answer I could relieve a lot of anxieties, but unfortunately many things are out of our control.

In the midst of all the bad, we must push ourselves to search for and hold on to the good. Still embracing Christmas and all it stands for doesn't mean that we are careless about the tragedies. We should still plan our holidays, bake our cookies, and enjoy our family gatherings. BUT we should also take a step back and consider what is most important; it's not about how much we spend on the gifts or how much food we pile on the table for the Christmas meal. It should be about embracing the blessings that we have and praying for those that have been less fortunate. We should pray for peace and mornings where children around the world can wake up with smiles. We should pray for an end to senseless violence. We should pray for safety for our military troops. We should pray for a growing consciousness and sense of morality. 

In the end I wish all of you a very Merry Christmas and a safe and healthy New Year. My prayer for you this holiday season is one of love, joy, peace, and HOPE.

What is it about this time of year?

What is it about this time of year that has our emotions on a roller coaster? One minute we're up and excited and the next we're crashing down out of control.

The season is undoubtedly busy; it has it's share of hustle and bustle and pressures. There are the highs that we've grown to expect ... festivities with friends, twinkling lights, decorations, tasty and fattening foods, and Christmas tunes. But then there are the lows; the ones that have people spiraling at times from stress and overwhelming moments.

I'm sure there are many explanations; different for everyone. There are those who are feeling blue because the Christmas season will be different this year due to a divorce or separation, the loss of a loved one, or even not having all your children home for the holidays. It's understandable that many, given their current situations, will find it harder to feel merry and bright. There are the many college students who are anxious and overwhelmed with getting through their final exams and scrambling to pack to come home for a few weeks in between their semesters. And then there are the pressures at work to try to fit 60 hours worth of work into 40 so that your To Do list will be manageable and allow you to take that much-needed time off over the holidays.

It goes without saying that there are those unmentioned expectations during the season; whether to send out Christmas cards, bake cookies, host a holiday gathering, shop for those special gifts, and 'yes' ... even whether or not to decorate a tree. You may think it's the 'other' people in your life that are applying the pressure when it reality it's probably you. We all tend to push ourselves too hard and expect too much; whether it's to please us or the other people in our lives is a question that only we can answer.

The bottom line is that we get get choose what is most important to us; it doesn't really matter what anyone else thinks. Our lives all have different seasons. My Christmas this year will be different than it was last year AND probably different than it will be next year. I decorated my tree and I chose to send out cards, but I'm going to support a local cookie walk this weekend allowing myself to bake only one batch myself. That's right, 'I' get to choose what's most important to me. Once we give ourselves permission to do that we can start to lesson some of the pressure and perhaps enjoy more of the 'highs' of the roller coaster.

What are some of your priorities this year?

And So I Ate A Donut

Have you ever had one of those weeks (or even a day) when things just did not go as planned? I get them all the time. Last night I knew I needed to be up early this morning so I was sincerely hoping for a good night's sleep. Seems like my body (or most likely my busy mind) had other plans because I've been awake since 3 a.m.

Life gets busy and chaotic, especially during the holiday season with so much on our plates, that even the slightest change of plans can throw off our schedule. Today I was bringing my vehicle into a dealership for the 3rd time to fix a warranty issue. Knowing that I plan A LOT on my day off the dealership offered to provide me with a free rental, for which I was grateful. Unfortunately the rental car company on site only had 'one' vehicle and as Murphy's Law would have it - the driver seat could not be raised and I could not see over the dashboard. Dumb luck I suppose or perhaps just my 'vertically challenged' genes giving me a hard time. I waited for more than an hour for another vehicle to be sent over.

So how did I handle this minor inconvenience? I wandered around the showroom, I watched an old rerun on the Game Show Network, and I found the complimentary box of donuts. Eating a donut isn't something I often do, but when I opened the box out of curiosity the chocolate covered donut was practically calling out to me, 'Pick me! Pick me! I'll make your day better.' Well, I caved and that little delicious calorie-filled donut was right. I was able to regain my perspective and get on with my day.

We will all have days that throw us unexpected curve balls and we will all end up with To Do lists that carry over to the next day, but in the grand scheme of things we must remember to not sweat the small stuff.

When's the last time your plans didn't go as planned? What helped you to regain your perspective?

What Will Your Holidays Look Like?

Holidays come at the same time every year, just like seasons. You can pretty much predict when they will arrive and what they will look like, but often things like 'life' get in the way and change things for us. 

Just like the weather can be unpredictable, things can happen in our lives that will change the flow from what always was to what will be now. Some events are glorious and what we've always dreamed of and others are unexpected and unfortunate.

We remember holidays as being times when families get together; there is tradition and laughter and food and card games ... times to make memories that we will always be able to hold on to. My holidays this year and for some people I know are changing. I know people whose adult children have married or relocated; the scenario of every other holiday will now begin. It's not a bad thing, just a new thing. Then I know families who have lost a loved one this year and their holidays have unwelcome adjustments. Their days will be different; they might be lonely or quiet. For some it will be hard to get into the festive spirit. Things will get better with time, but it will be a process - one that will require patience and optimism.

What will your holiday season look like this year? Will you have additional guests at your table? Will you have the sounds of new little feet running through your house? Will you have a quietness that is deafening? Remember that Christmas is the season of giving. Give of your heart. Give of your time. Give extra hugs whenever needed. Whatever your holidays look like make the most of them. Create new traditions for yourself and your loved ones and you will have a multitude of memories for years to come.

Give Like You Would Hope To Get

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving. A day when we hope to be with family, share fellowship, good food, and football. For many, though, it is just another day; a day to go to work, a day to be without family, and a day to do nothing special. For everyone I would hope it is a day to reflect and be thankful; for what we have been blessed with. But, also as the Christmas holidays draw nearer it is a time to consider how we can give.

At this time of year you will see bell ringers with the red Salvation Army buckets, boxes in banks and businesses set up for canned food drives and Toys For Tots, and many 'giving trees' in schools and churches. Take tomorrow to be thankful for what you have and think of how you can pay it forward, BUT give like you would hope to get.

Over the years my family and I have packaged food, filled gift bags for children, visited nursing homes, and sorted pallets of canned food items to check the expiration dates. I cannot begin to tell you how many giving and thoughtful people there are in my neighboring communities. Sadly I can also tell you that people will donate used winter coats that are stained and torn and drop off boxes of canned food with dates that are grossly expired. I kindly pointed out an expired date to a person once who dropped off a case of soup only to have them tell me, 'That's o.k. Whoever gets it is poor and they'll be grateful for whatever they get." OMG, really? How sad and selfish is that?

My point is that if you, yourself, would no longer wear a blouse or a coat or a pair of pants because they are stained or torn then WHY would you expect someone else to? Perhaps the recipient is in need and has had a run of bad luck, but that's no reason to strip them of their dignity as well. If YOU would not eat a can of beans or soup with a date that was 10+ months past its expiration date then WHY would you expect someone else to?

Yes, take tomorrow (and every other day) to be thankful for what you have and when you ponder the idea of giving during the holidays remember to give like you would hope to get.

Embrace Your Talents

If you are like me you sometimes compare yourself to others, at least from time to time. Even the most confident person can occasionally have doubts. Maybe you think someone is smarter or skinnier or they sing or speak better than you. That's o.k. and I would even venture to say that it's normal. It's easy to feel a little intimidated when you sense that someone does something better than you. Mostly I don't let it bother me, except when it's something I've been striving to improve upon. But then I remember that God didn't give all of us the same gifts and talents. You won't have the same gifts as your brother or your spouse, or your neighbor or even yourself from 10 years ago.

I continue to work with my own gifts and talents and remember that 'I can do all things through him who strengthens me.' (Philippians 4:13)

• I TRY not to compare myself to others.
• I TRY not to put larger-than-life expectations on myself.
• I TRY not to knowingly set myself up for disappointment.
• BUT I do TRY to work with what I've been given and not waste it.
• I do TRY to use my gifts for good.
• I do TRY to make a difference.
• And I do TRY to bring joy to others whenever I can.

The key word, for better or worse, is TRY. That's really all any of us can do. When we quit TRYING the battle is already lost.

We all need to be lifted up at times and we all need reassurances. In Psalm 139:14 it says, 'I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.' This verse reminds me that I am not alone, that the gifts and talents I possess were given only to me by someone much bigger than me. Who am I to argue with the One who created me? If we keep this in mind perhaps we will embrace our gifts and talents more than we do. We will embrace who we were created to be and use these gifts for the Glory of God. Sometimes we need to pause and take a long look on the mirror and accept the things we are, yet improve upon the characteristics that need some work.

• I can accept that I am a stickler for details.
• I can accept that I would sometimes prefer to write rather than speak.
• I can accept that I am creative, that I will skip through a pile of autumn leaves whenever I can, and that I would eat pizza 5 days a week if given the chance.
• I can accept that I have an inner child that still likes to color with crayons.
• I can accept that I will always dot my 'i's' and cross my 't's' and find the grammatical errors in published books.
• And I can accept that my faith journey is a work in progress.

Here is one verse to leave you with and remember ... Your talent is God's gift to you - what you do with it is your gift back to God.

Romans 12:4-8 (NIV)

For just as each of us has one body with many members,

and these members do not all have the same function,

so in Christ we, though many, form one body,

and each member belongs to all the others.

We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us.

If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith;

if it is serving, then serve;

if it is teaching, then teach;

if it is to encourage, then give encouragement;

if it is giving, then give generously;

if it is to lead, do it diligently;

if it is to show mercy, do it cheerfully.

Make A Difference

It's that tricky time of year. There are still some golden leaves left on the trees, the weather is giving us a taste of what winter temperatures will be like, at least one radio station is playing Christmas music, the Hallmark movies are in full swing, and some of Santa's helpers can already be seen in the mall. So what does that mean for you and me?

Christmas is a very special holiday for me; as well, so is Thanksgiving. Christmas is a time for family. For me it is more about celebrating the birth of Jesus, but 'YES' I will admit I also like the season. The twinkling lights, the smell of cinnamon and evergreen, the laughter of children, and most of the decorations (still not sure I understand what the flying pig with a Santa hat is supposed to represent). There are those who will cringe and protest and say that it is all happening too soon. There are those who will say Christmas has gone completely commercial ... and they'd probably be right. BUT ... the season is what you choose to make of it. If you don't want to shop now, then don't. If you don't want to send out Christmas cards this year, then don't. If you don't believe in shopping on Thanksgiving day, then don't (I know I won't). BUT, don't be mad that the season is starting early. 

My suggestion: Set a budget that YOU are comfortable with (don't go overboard and don't go in debt over it), make your list of what you'd like to buy or how you want to celebrate the season, and start now ... slowly and at your own pace. I have my short list and will be shopping early. There are bargains and sales out there NOW. My goal is finish before Thanksgiving. Then I have the month of December to truly enjoy the Christmas season. I will write out some Christmas cards, I will bake a few cookies, I will try to gather with friends and be social, we will put our tree up and decorate, and my family and I will try to make a difference.

On Thanksgiving (and every other day) we will pause and remember all of the things we have to be thankful for; a roof over our heads, food to eat, family that we love, good health, our faith, and our values and priorities. We will think of ways we can give back during what can be a busy, chaotic, and lonely season for many. How can you be there for someone else? The list is endless.

• You can bake some cookies and visit a home bound friend or neighbor.
• You can buy an extra winter coat and donate it to a coat drive.
• You can take a tag or two from the many giving trees you'll find at your school or church.
• You can pay it forward and buy lunch for the table next to you or the person behind you in line.
• Or, since it's not all about money you can simply call someone you haven't talked to in a while and not only talk, but listen.

Combine your holidays ... Thanksgiving AND Christmas. Be thankful for what you have and what you have to offer and MAKE A DIFFERENCE this season. And more importantly, don't be embarrassed to say 'Merry Christmas' in public.