I Can Still See The Light

Sometimes (as of late) the days and weeks have become dark with stresses, fears, and concerns. People always tell you to 'hang in there'; that you'll find the light at the end of the tunnel. But often people have a difficult time finding the light or at least staying focused on it.

The last few months have had a lot darkness and uncertainties in them. Having our Stay Home Stay Safe orders start to loosen up came at a good time. People needed some light. People needed to be reminded of their happiness and joy. We can only take so much doom and gloom, before we start to feel like we're being pulled in.

On Mondays I participate in a Zoom meeting called 'Motivation Monday'. I've come to rely on this group to listen to people I know and people I am getting to know; to hear their input and help lift each other up by sharing their insights, their goals and their hopes. But this past Monday was the first session that I missed. I had a day off and decided to drive to see my daughter and her girlfriend about an hour away. It was a gloriously beautiful day with sunshine and blue skies and temperatures hovering around 75 degrees. Perfect weather for a little gardening. I showed up with my outside shoes, a change of clothes, and my bucket of gardening tools ... prepared for a little sweat. We came up with a

plan and dug in, literally. We dug out an overgrown ugly shrub and replaced it with a thriving Hydrangea bush. We planted Lavender and Sage, as well as some colorful annual flowers. I planted a sunny yellow Zinnia in a bright blue pot for the front porch. I pulled some weeds and got things watered. Then proceeded to the back yard. I dug up an overgrown perennial, thinned out a few others, and planted a beautiful lavender colored Delphinium. Added some multi colored annuals and rearranged a few plants. The finishing touch? I hung a wind chime from the tree in the corner.

After months of feeling cooped up, it felt good to do something physical. It felt good to see instant results. It felt good to make someone else feel happy and excited about the work. It felt good to see the beauty around me. It's okay to acknowledge the pain or stress or anxiety in our lives .... but it's also good to take the time to soak in our own happiness and joy.

I felt like my stars had aligned ... I had the day off of work (my first vacation day for 2020), the weather was nice, an opportunity presented itself, my efforts were well received, I got to do something that makes me happy and helps me relax, I could see the efforts of my work, and I DIDN'T HAVE TO WEAR A MASK. All in all it was a glorious day.

The ironic part? The next morning I listened to the YouTube version of the Zoom meeting I had chosen to miss. It was about happiness and joy. It was about the value and importance of taking the time for yourself to do something you enjoy. It was about the value of the endorphins your body creates. It was about making yourself happy and cheering someone else up.

Guess I was more on track that I realized. Sometimes the track feels endless and often it's hard to see that light at the end of the tunnel, but for me I feel I CAN STILL SEE THE LIGHT. And that gives me hope to hang on to.

What makes you happy?

Do you remember to take some time for yourself?

What should I say?

It's been an unusual last 12 weeks. We've been dealing with the Covid-19 pandemic. We've dealt with 'Stay Home Stay Safe' orders and proper social distancing. We're dealing with major tensions in our culture. It's been a lot to deal with and think about for a lot of people. There are different opinions to just about EVERYTHING these days. Don't believe me? Check out social media (if you have the stomach for it). I've read comments full of accusations and hatred from strangers directed to other strangers, but I've also read sad comments from people directed to people they know.

Right now I've been focusing on the last 12 weeks, but MANY have been dealing with insurmountable stresses and tensions for a lot longer; declining health, financial burdens, relationship issues, racism, and so much more.

Life has become overwhelming for so many. Many of us want to help. Many of us want to understand both sides of an issue. Many of us have good intentions and want to do something positive to help. Many of us want to say the 'right' thing. So what should we do?  What should we say? I think before we speak or do anything, we need to first learn to listen.

We should never judge what we don't understand, that only makes us part of the problem rather than part of a solution. If we don't understand something, then we need to ask questions, BUT we also need to be prepared to listen. Whether we will fully agree with someone else or not isn't the point. The point is that we need to base our own views on facts, not predetermined stereotypes and ignorance.

Do I pretend to have the answers to life's big questions? Absolutely not. Sure, I have my own opinions on different things, but I generally (for the most part) keep them to myself and my inner circle rather than trying to win people over to my side just to make my side louder or bigger.

The next time you're facing something big and unpleasant (which could be on any given day), take a step back. Ask questions and try to view life or the situation from another perspective. It doesn't mean I expect you to change your opinion; you may or you may not. What I hope for is that we can all come to a consensus that we need to listen more before we react. Once we throw words out there, we can't get them back. We can all learn from our mistakes, myself included. None of us are perfect. We can ALL do better.

Have you had moments when you've reacted too fast and said something you later wanted to take back?

Were you able to remedy the situation and move forward in a more positive way?