Choose To Be Positive

This morning I listened to a podcast that talked about when we feel that life is unfair. For some people that could be just about any day of the week. Others seem to have the golden life without ever experiencing complications or little bumps in the road ... or at least that's how we choose to perceive them to be. The thing is; you never REALLY know what is going on in someone else's life until you walk in their shoes for a day. They may have us all fooled into thinking they have no stresses and everything is going their way, when in reality they may be having to make some really serious decisions and life isn't quite as cozy and perfect as they would have us all think.

You see, everyone gets dealt an unfair hand once in a while. No one's life is perfect. No one gets a pass. The difference is in how we handle what we are dealt. Do we wallow in it and let the situation or circumstance dictate to us how we will let it affect us? Or do we choose to overcome it? Don't get me wrong, some of life's curve balls can't be taken back and we don't always have the power to change them. Someone will get a cancer diagnosis that is not treatable. Someone will be stuck in an abusive relationship where someone takes charge and leaves the other person feeling vulnerable and helpless. Someone will lose their job leaving them wondering how they will keep a roof over their head or food on their table. Some situations will require us to be humble and ask for help. Some situations will require us to do some heavy soul-searching and digging deep for inner strength.

Sometimes we have things happen that we feel are unfair, but all we can do is accept them and try our best to deal with them. We get to choose whether our proverbial glass is half empty or half full. Our attitude is sometimes the only thing we will have control over. When someone wants to remind you of the possible half empty version, tell them 'No thanks!'.

Whatever you are dealing with right now, know that there WILL be people in your corner ready to support you and lend you a hand or a shoulder to cry on when you need a release. There will also be people who you thought were there for you, but really aren't. And that's okay. It's sad and unfortunate, but ultimately it's okay. We can't tell other people what to feel and we can't always expect them to know what we need if we don't tell them. There may be times when we point blank tell them and they still won't understand; that we cannot change.

I hope that today and every day when you are facing an unfortunate circumstance or a question that needs answered, I hope that you can dig deep and choose to face it with a positiveness that comes from having faith. The faith of knowing that you don't have to go through anything alone. The faith of knowing that there are people who care about you, and the faith that in the end everything will be okay.

When you are faced with a sinking feeling and a weighed down heart, choose to be positive. It won't fix everything, but it will remind you that you are stronger and more resilient than you think. And that is no small thing ... it is pretty darn MIGHTY.

What are you currently go through and what can we do to lighten your load a bit?

The Battle Of The What Ifs

With everything that is going on in today's society; competitive job markets, political unrests, health scares, economic statuses ... it is no wonder that the average person is left to deal with worry and anxiety. Stress isn't a new word, by any means. People, young and old, have been dealing with it for generations. People worry about their their incomes, they worry about the rising costs of a college education for their children, they worry about the price of health insurance, utilities, about the strength of relationships, and about practically everything else.

It was only a week ago that my pastor targeted his sermon about worries. How by worrying about tomorrow today, we were basically wasting our time because God had a plan and there was enough worry for today without worrying about the future too (I'm paraphrasing, of course). I find comfort in knowing that God has a plan for my life and those I care about, but He also made me the way that I am. He gave me a set of gifts and talents, which I attempt to use as wisely as I can. But I am also a natural born worrier, a mediator, a wanna-be Wonder Woman who seems to think it is expected for me to have answers and solutions to everyone's questions and problems at any given time. With that self-imposed responsibility, though, comes tension headaches, stiff shoulders, countless sleepless nights, worry lines around my eyes, and bouts of unexplained tears. I want to convince myself that I am strong and can deal with anything (and most times I can), but sometimes I am humbled and reminded of my humanness. No one else expects me to have it ALL together ALL of the time, well some may, but I am only one person.

I have a tattered small piece of paper taped to the rim of my computer screen at work that says '...God will never give me more to handle than he knows my shoulders can bear.' I read it several times a day to try and help me keep an even perspective.

Most days I am a 'glass is half full' kind of gal, but we all have our moments of doubt when the WHAT IFS start creeping their gloomy heads in to our days and dreams at night. What if our friend loses their job? What if the college students we know don't get jobs after graduation? What if we don't meet our deadlines and quotas at work? What if the price of health insurance continues to rise more than it already has, HOW will be be able to pay for it? Worse, what if someone gets sick and we actually need to USE the insurance, how will be afford to pay the deductibles?

Trying to keep the glass half full is a lot of work; it is no wonder we have sleepless nights, nauseous stomachs, and headaches. Study after study has shown that anxiety can give us physical symptoms; being 'sick' of the stress and the worry is more real than you know.

So, what's the perfect answer? I wish I knew. Continue to take life one day at a time, I suppose. Continue to do the best that we can using the tools we presently have. We'll never be able to get 30 hours in a day or 8 days in a week. We need to be able to slow down long enough to hear ourselves think; to temporarily block out all the things that may be overwhelming us. We need to set boundaries for ourselves and pray that people will respect them for what they are. We need to find an inner peace that allows us to take the 'being perfect' pressure off of ourselves. We need to trust God more that He really won't give us more to handle than He knows we can deal with.

What if we could say NO once in a while when we were asked to add something to our already overflowing plate? What if we forced ourselves to take 20 minutes out of our already busy day to focus on us? What if  we learned, a little at a time, to trust that everything could turn out okay? What if we packed the Wonder Woman lasso and golden cuffs back into the Halloween dress up box and stopped thinking that we needed to wear them every day?

Personally, I'd love to try focusing on these WHAT IFS instead. 

*Disclaimer ... this blog post is my twenty minutes of ME time for today. Trying to use my own advice. 😉