How do you measure time?

There are many ways to measure time? Maybe you have a techy calendar on your phone or a paper one on your refrigerator. These will certainly help you keep track of birthdays, vacation days, and upcoming appointments. But what about remembering the seasons of your life? Remembering when you experienced the highs and lows?

People experience different levels and stages in their lives. Maybe you're at the place where you measure your life by everything that happened before and after retirement. Before you had a family to raise or when you started re-experiencing life with an empty nest.

Our parents and grandparents may refer to how life was before or after a war. 

A patient may define their journey as before or after their medical diagnosis. 

A young adult may label their accomplishments as before or after their college graduation.

Whatever category you find yourself in it's interesting to understand the perspective you bring to the table. What situations or life events altered your journey?

Almost anyone these days could measure family gatherings or vacations as before Covid complicated life or now when people have resumed many of their activities.

How do you measure your life; what you've accomplished or what your current goals are? 

What stage do you find yourself in?

Treasure The Memories

Lately I've been or know people who have been to a lot of funerals; for family members, fellow church members, and friends. Funerals can be tough. While for some we can see them as someone finally being at peace and no longer physically suffering, they can also catch us by surprise and leave us wondering why someone had to be taken from us so young and with so much life left to live.

We attend funerals and want to be there emotionally for our family and friends, but don't always know what to say. To a grieving person, they may not want to hear, 'They're in a better place now', because truth be told they would rather that their loved one was still here with them. I was at a funeral not too long ago when the wife of the deceased said, 'He looks good. It's the best he's looked in weeks.' I think it gave her a small sense of comfort to have her husband looking peaceful. It gave her a positive image and a good memory to hold on to. It truly doesn't matter what you say, it's just important that you are there for those who need it.

Bad memories can be haunting for some people and difficult to let go of. The weight they carry with them can be overwhelming, even many years later. Good memories though should be treasured. Sometimes amidst the sad and bitter memories, a positive nugget can be found. When you are able to find that one, you should hold tight to it and carry it with you.

When I was younger (around 11 or 12), my parents were fighting and going through an ugly divorce. In the midst of that I had a best friend named Julia. I would spend as much time as I could with her and her family. To me, her family was like something out of a story book. Her mother was a school teacher and her father was a school principal. What I remember most was them having fun as a family; laughing, having dinner together, and making time in the summer to go to their cottage on a lake. The summer they invited me to go with them for a week was like a little slice of heaven to me; like going to summer camp. I laughed at the breakfast table with them, went on daily hikes and scavenger hunts along the railroad tracks with my best friend, and learned how to water ski on the lake. It was the longest and shortest week of my life; it was like I had traveled to another place (a happy place) and didn't want it to end.

Funny that today as I am preparing for another funeral at my church next week, I thought about Julia and her family. I was reminded about the good times and memories we created. Julia and I lost touch when I moved and went to a new school, but I never forgot about her friendship or the amazing gift I felt her family gave me that week. When you are child caught up in the stress and complexities of a family divorce situation, a peaceful week away with a friend and their family can give you hope. Hope for a brighter tomorrow, hope for a different scenario for your own future. Funny thing is, I don't know that Julia or her parents ever really knew what an impact that one week had on my life.

Hold on to those special memories; especially when they resurface and remind you of the goodness that people can share. Those memories are such a gift. We never know when we are impacting someone else's life in a positive way. Anything and everything we do can affect someone else; if not today then maybe years from now. Open your heart and share the goodness. You are more of a blessing to those around you than you may ever realize.

What's a special memory that you hold close to your heart?

Thanksgiving Traditions: What's Yours?

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving and I have many things to be thankful for ... my husband, my children, my job, a roof over my head, my health, and my faith. Sure, we all have days that we're stressed or overwhelmed, but all in all things are good.

 

I'm looking forward to a Thanksgiving holiday weekend, good food, spending time with family, and permission to turn our outside Christmas lights on. With Thanksgiving comes special family traditions. Some people will cook their favorite dishes. Some will sit at the dinner table and each person will take a moment to share what they're thankful for. Many will watch football, others will engage in the annual kids vs. the dads ping pong match, while some make peruse the Black Friday advertisements.

 

What's special for me and my family? Many of the above items for sure, but we'll definitely have to throw in an episode of  'Extreme Pumpkin Chuckers'. It just wouldn't be Thanksgiving without it.

 

How about you? Any special Thanksgiving traditions you can share?

Let's Continue Reviewing Shall We?

This week I have a few days off of work and have been enjoying every minute (well most of it anyway - there was the one little incident Christmas Eve with the 2nd degree burn). I had a wonderful Christmas Eve & Christmas Day with extended family. My family & I went to lunch on Monday and joined my sister and most of her family. We had a nice lunch and good conversation. One of my nephews is on a short leave from his tour of duty in Afghanistan. It was great to visit with all of them. Yesterday my family & I went to the movies with good friends ('We Bought A Zoo' with Matt Damon) and dinner. This morning my husband and I took our daughter and her friend to a local outreach center where we packed away their Christmas decorations and sorted through a pallet of canned goods for expired items. We topped off our afternoon by taking them to a local music store so our daughter could pick out her new Fender banjo. The banjo may seem extravagant, but she saved every penny of her Christmas and work money to pay for it. She is one happy 16 year old aspiring musician right now.

This week has been about celebrating the real reason of Christmas, about spending quality time with family (our son has been home all week visiting from out of state), about enjoying people's company, about resting when we can, and unfortunately about eating way too much (but I'll deal with that next week).

Let's look back again and review another of my favorites blog entries. This one actually happens to be the first one on this blog. If you've read it before, that's o.k. - you can read it again. If you haven't, I hope you enjoy it.

'Balancing Act' (July 30, 2009)

There’s something to be said for being in balance. We have to balance our checkbooks, our fun with our responsibilities, and our priorities. We even have to find a balance between living in the moment and planning for our futures (I find that to be a tough one).

Have you ever felt a bit out of balance? I don’t mean like when you have an inner ear infection and your equilibrium is unsteady … I mean when you feel like your ‘life’ is a bit lopsided? Feeling ‘out of balance’ can be caused by too much stress, your health, your marriage, your job, or often a schedule that’s just too demanding. Obviously some things we have control over and some we don’t. When that’s the case, it may be time to rethink things. We need to think of ways we can gain some of the balance back.

Young children often have big dreams for their future … growing up to be a fireman, an astronaut, a ballerina, or a doctor. But as we find ourselves getting older, we sometimes realize that our dreams have changed. Now many have desires to see their children grow and get married and start the next generation with kids of their own. There’s a lot of pleasure in seeing any of these dreams comes true.

Keeping something balanced, no matter what it is, will take effort and concentration – most things don’t just happen by chance. In Proverbs 16:11 it says “Honest scales and balances are from the Lord; all the weights in the bag are of his making.” I think the Lord wants us to have balanced, healthy and happy lives. We put our best foot forward and are most productive when we aren’t feeling overwhelmed or distracted. Some might say it’s about getting our priorities right, about determining what’s really important and what’s not. We can cross having an abundance of material things off our list. They’re just things. Maybe a good way to stay balanced and on course is to take a closer look at our current goals, as well as look back at some of the dreams we had when we were younger. Have you accomplished everything you set out to do? I know I haven’t and I’m sure I’m not alone. I seem to be drawn to the Proverbs lately. In Proverbs 16:9 it says “In his heart a man plans his course, but the Lord determines his steps.” Is there a more definite reason why some things don’t get completed when we want them to? Maybe it’s more about God’s timing.

Perhaps if you’re feeling a bit out of balance these days you need to take a closer look at the list of goals you have. Pick one you always wanted to achieve, but for whatever reason never did, and try again. Maybe it’s time to go back and finish the college degree you started many years ago, write a book, or be a mentor for someone. That’s the nice thing about goals – they come in many shapes and sizes and can be tweaked at any time to fit your current life. Maybe it is as simple as writing a letter or calling an old friend you haven’t talked to in ages or finally cleaning out and organizing your basement. Finishing something you started might be just the mental boost your life needs to get itself back on track.

Whatever is keeping your life off its steady axis these days, I hope you find the right combination and the support you need to get your sense of balance back.