Don't Jump On The Band Wagon

The news over the last week has had sadness, madness, and mixed emotions for many. The recent massacre in a Charleston church left many feeling bitter, afraid, and anxious; not to mention confused. Confused about how they should try to practice what is preached, forgive what seems unforgivable, and find the ability to return to their house of worship and hold tightly to their faith.

In the midst of a chaotic moment such as that there was the news of the Supreme Court ruling for same-sex marriages. The media, including Facebook, was riddled with rainbow-infused photos to show support for the ruling;  as well as bitter statements made for both sides. I read what I thought were well-thought out comments and I read ignorant ones (on BOTH sides).

How I feel about the topic is basically nobody's business but my own. If asked I will share my opinion (one-on-one), but I will never purposely try to persuade you or force my opinions down your throat. I believe that everyone is entitled to their own opinion, but I do NOT believe that it gives people the right to be disrespectful. How some people can cry about others mistreating them and being disrespectful when they readily bash anyone who doesn't agree with them is beyond me. Tearing others down in order to build them self up does nothing; at least nothing productive.

Everyone can find a source to quote, a study, or even a scripture verse to back up their way of logic if they look hard enough. Why? Because every written word is left open to interpretation. Trust me ... I was assigned to the 'negative' side on my high school debate team. I found it difficult to be persuasive of things I didn't personally believe in. I would never make a good defense attorney (no offense), I just don't have it in me to defend something my heart and beliefs aren't into just because someone tells me to.

So what is my point? Only to be careful with your words and your actions. Don't be too quick to jump on the proverbial band wagon because it's easy and it has momentum. It takes much more courage and character to hold strong to your own beliefs. Don't be misled and don't be part of the problem; that's too easy.

The Polls Are Now Closed ...

Today was election day. The absentee ballots have been turned in, the in-person votes have been cast, and the predictions will now roll in as the votes are tabulated. For me, election day has always had its pros and cons. Pros being that we can witness democracy in action; people voting and hoping that their voices are heard, and the campaigning drawing to a close. Cons being the manipulation of the campaign circuits and the sometimes disrespect of many voters.

Today on Facebook I saw graphic after graphic posted to people's pages saying that they had voted ... which was great. What I also saw was various TV media stations making early predictions based on exit polls in attempts to influence one party or the other that one side was winning over the other and they needed to get out and vote. I guarantee you that anyone could poll any targeted group about a pre-selected topic and come away with the result they were looking for. Ironically the early exit polls all start coming out in the middle of the day ... seriously? I've been voting now for over 30 years and I have not once been asked who I voted for as I left a poll; which is probably good because if asked I would have to tell them that it was none of their business. It's all manipulation no matter how you look at it. As if the last several weeks haven't had enough TV & radio commercials with content that did nothing more than bash the opponent, we now get to observe Facebook and Internet 'comments' from people who hide behind cartoon and fictitious profile names. I always seem to quit reading after about the 8th or 9th ignorant comment because my stomach starts to roll. It continues to amaze me how freely the disrespectful and ignorant words can flow from one stranger toward another stranger.

I am all for exercising our right to vote. I am all for fighting for our freedoms and our rights; freedom of speech being one of them. But with every right and freedom comes responsibility ... or at least it should. 

Late tonight or tomorrow morning there will be both acceptance and concession speeches. As with any competition there will be winners and losers. At this point all I can hope for is a brighter, more positive tomorrow for ALL of us.

How did you fare during today's election?

Getting A Free Pass

Remember when you played Monopoly and you got a 'Get Out Of Jail Free' card? It allowed you a 'pass'; meaning you didn't have to go to jail and wait three throws of the dice or you didn't have to pay the dreaded $50 fee (I think that was the amount). What if you could do or say whatever you wanted in real life and not have to pay any consequences for it? Unfortunately if we watch the evening news we'll see that it happens just about every day. Yet we can hope  that we won't have to deal with any serious issues or crimes. I'll bet we all know that one special someone in our lives though who acts as if they're above reproach. That one person who thinks they can be rude and inconsiderate and never have to apologize or consider any one else's feelings.

How does that person make you feel? When they say rude things or try to be manipulative do you feel bullied? Bullies come in all shapes and sizes and ages. They can be found on the elementary school bus, in the high school locker room, in the office, in your own home, or in rush hour traffic. They're those people who, for whatever reason, feel better when they're putting someone else down; whether it's about your appearance, your values, your goals, or your accomplishments. For decades there have been those people who will tear others down in order to build themselves up. It's always at someone else's expense.

Do they realize how they're behaving? Do they even want to change? Deep down are they sorry, but feel trapped in their own behavior? I'm sure every case is different. I know some people who are able to get a snide remark into just about every conversation; for some I think it's on purpose. Sadly, for some I think it's become a normal way of life.

So what do we do when we encounter these people? Do we try to avoid them? Do we grow thicker skin? Do we let their rudeness just roll off like water? We can try these approaches, but they won't always work. We'll feel vulnerable at times and hurt and other times we'll remain strong and be able to tell ourselves to 'consider the source'. 

How do handle your 'special someone'? What would your advice be to someone in those shoes?