Friday, July 28, 2017

Making The Quick Decision

Are you a good decision maker? Do you make snap decisions or are you a thinker; someone who analyzes every possible angle before choosing which way to go? Truth be told I am probably a little bit of both, just depends on the situation (and the day).

Having the ability to make a quick decision or choice is good if it's a life-saving reflex. We've all heard of the right arm 'mom seat belt' right? I've saved many lives in my lifetime, although I'm sure that the seat belt that came with the cars worked just as well as my arm ... but hey, better safe than sorry. If you see a child wander into the street while playing, you run and stop them, right? Doesn't matter if it's your child or the kid from down the road. Yes, some quick reflexes are helpful when it comes to making that split-second decision.

But making a quick decision about something that ultimately could change your 'big picture' in a way that's stressful or unhealthy isn't a good thing. That's when it would be a good idea to pause and think about everything involved before committing yourself to something. Sometimes we take the wrong job or agree to be part of a relationship because we feel pressured. I once held a job at a travel agency that dealt only with cruises. I agreed to give the job a try because the employer made it sound very enticing. After one week and finding out her expectations (and unhealthy demands) I decided I was not the right person for the job. Looking back I wish I had thought more about my decision before I accepted so quickly. If I had I would have had another 5 nights of good sleep under my belt, but lesson learned.

So why do we sometimes find ourselves making the quick decision that isn't necessarily right for us? I can only speak for myself, but I can admit that I am a people-pleaser. Maybe that's a good trait on most days, but some days it isn't. I often have a hard time saying no because I don't want to disappoint anyone. The fear of disappointment can be very daunting. I somehow convince myself that if I say no things won't happen or get done in a timely fashion and I will be letting someone down. It's hard to accept the fact that even I am dispensable; even I can say NO and things will still proceed without me. Who knew that the world didn't really revolve around me, lol.

We all make our own choices and must then accept the responsibilities that go with them; good or bad. If we all knew how to make the right choice all the time I'm sure we would, but we don't and need to accept that (sometimes daily, lol).

The next time you're faced with making an important decision remember that it's okay NOT to give an immediate answer. In the long run it's better that your answer is the right one for you, rather than just being the speediest.

What was the last quick decision you made? And no, I'm not referring to making a dinner or movie choice. :)

Friday, July 21, 2017

Is Your Summer Half Over?

There's that old controversy 'Is the glass half empty or half full?'. It doesn't just pertain to attitudes; being an optimist or a pessimist. Many people are lighthearted and full of optimism; they see the good in us and themselves (that we can't always see). Others (and I know many specific cases) will be negative about EVERYTHING; the weather, the economy, their relationships, their health, and any other little thing that crops up on any given day. Is being an optimist in our DNA? I'm not a scientist (nor have I played one on TV, lol) so I really couldn't say, but I do think most times it is a choice. 

I can get up any morning to listen to the weather report and decide right then if I'm going to let the fact that it may be hot and humid outside ruin my day. Will my hair get frizzy, yet flat on top? You bet it will, although you would think that combination wouldn't even be possible. I have choices. I can wear a scarf or a hat or wear a headband. I can make the best of the situation and laugh about it with everyone else I see that isn't having their picture perfect day either. We are never truly alone.

If we start out our day with the mindset that it's going to be disappointing or a complete let down, then chances are we've already set the stage and nature (and life) will just take its course and follow. We always have a choice when it comes to our attitudes. I know there are A LOT of very real things out there in the world that I have no control over. I can't control how other people drive. I can't control when something will or won't happen. Just as I can't control when God is going to send someone my way at just the time when I need them most. 

I know one rather negative person who I always joked and said, 'Thier glass isn't just half empty, to them it also has a hole in the bottom.' They choose to look for the bad and then somehow make it bigger or worse. I don't know that I could live that way. It would be too sad and too lonely, but everyone has to make their own choices.

So, as I sit here at my computer and glance at the calendar I notice that we are past the half way mark in the month of July which could mean either ... your summer is half over ... OR you have half of your summer yet to look forward to with anticipation and thankfulness.

What's your outlook? Are you looking at Labor Day as being the end (of whatever that means to you) or are you looking at today as being the start of another great day full of opportunities.

Hmmm, I think I will be optimistic that today's humidity won't be TOO bad and look forward to all that is yet to come.

What's on your horizon for the next six weeks?

Tuesday, July 11, 2017

What motivates you?

What is your current goal? What is your long term goal? What makes you finally define something as more than just a passing thought, but rather as a goal (which requires commitment)?

Do you want to lose 10# to wear that special dress to a wedding at the end of the summer? Are you interviewing for your first post-graduate job? Are you trying to save money to tackle a certain project that's been on the back burner for too long? Do you want to finally get your life (and basement) organized?

Why do you want to achieve whatever 'it' is? Will accomplishing 'it' make you feel more fulfilled?

What will it take to make you succeed? Your passion? Your unbelievable drive? The potential end result? Will it be your amazing support system or giving yourself a deadline that will help you succeed?

There are self-help books on the market. There are motivational tapes you can listen to (if you still have access to a Walkman). There are life coaches and fitness trainers who will help you stay on track.

I'm not talking about the achieving the predictable New Year's Eve resolutions or the 'it's time to get back into the summer swimsuit challenges'. I'm talking about conquering your fears in the here and now. What is it you REALLY want to do? Why do you want it so bad that you're willing to put yourself in a vulnerable position to go after it? Who is in your corner to support you? How will you feel when you get to the top of YOUR mountain? What will your mountaintop view look like?

I know what MY current challenges are and why I want to overcome them; I want to lose the nagging 5-10# that will never go away, I want to sleep through the night more than two nights in a row, I want to spend more time with my granddaughters, I want to be able to give myself permission to carve out the occasional ME time and not feel guilty for doing it, and I want to learn how to forgive and move on. I am a work in progress, but that's okay ... at least if I am in progress I must be moving forward.

How about you? 

What are your current challenges and how can I help you over come them?