Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Unsolicited Optimism

We all have those days when we are feeling a bit stressed or overwhelmed. We try to deal with everything we are dealt with on our own. We often convince ourselves that if we can't keep up we must be weak, but realistically we all need a little help. Okay ... sometimes a lot of help. It's not always easy to keep up with the unpredictable curve balls that life seems to throw at us.

Sometimes to get through things we need a hug, or an encouraging cup of tea with a friend, or even a big bowl of ice cream (sea salt caramel usually works). Often though we just need a momentary distraction to help us regain perspective and strength. Surprisingly what helps the most is a dose of unsolicited optimism. Optimism and positivity are free and can be just what the doctor ordered. Sometimes it can even come from the most unexpected source; that's when it can feel like a successful intervention.

I had one of those days earlier this week; I had to take care of some unexpected family matters and was worn out (both mentally and physically from not sleeping). I had an opportunity to attend a BUNCO night for the ladies of my church. I planned to go and then almost talked myself out of it. I wasn't feeling social or upbeat and really didn't feel like talking, but decided to go anyway. One of the ladies that I occasionally talk to gave me an unsolicited giant dose of optimism and positivity. I certainly wasn't expecting it which made it all the nicer of a gesture. She was genuine and sincere and told me she liked my newest hairstyle. Crazy right? After a rough couple of days, how my hair looked was pretty far down on my list of priorities, but her compliment made me feel good. Then she told her sister about the pictures she'd seen of my summer flowers and how pretty and inviting my back patio looked. Wow! All these unexpected compliments from someone who didn't know I was feeling overwhelmed or down and could use a mental boost. 

Once again it goes to show the power of words. I know I say it all the time; that words have the power to build someone up or just as easily to tear them down, but it's so true. Saying something nice to someone may be just what they need at that moment. You don't need to know what they're dealing with. You don't need to have the answers they are looking for. You don't need to be able to fix anything. By just being upbeat and nice you are doing something special, you are giving them something they don't have at that particular moment. It doesn't take ANY planning on your part, not even extra effort. Just be nice. Keep it real. Open a door for someone at the grocery store. Tell a parent that they should be proud of their child because their child just picked up and returned a $5.00 bill to the elderly man who dropped it. It will let the child know that good deeds don't go unnoticed and it will let the parent know that they are doing a good job raising their child. Maybe that parent is feeling overwhelmed and raising the child all on their own. Maybe your sincere compliment is the reinforcement they needed that day.

As usual I have no answers on how to fix the world's problems, merely observations and experiences to share.

When was the last time someone caught you off guard with a nice comment or gesture? 
How did it make you feel?

Monday, July 9, 2018

It's Okay To Push Yourself

Sometimes our lists of things to do can be daunting. There's always outdoor work that needs to be done at home. There's an  'IN' box at work that is almost always full. Even the magnetic notepad on the side of the fridge for the next trip to the grocery store ALWAYS seems to have something written on it. There are days when you might want to just collapse when you get home and say 'enough is enough', but then you push yourself to do one or two more chores before you call it a night.

Why do we always have something to do? Great question; probably because we write our own To Do lists (at least that's been my problem). I am a glorified, semi-professional list-maker! I always have things to tend to (but who doesn't?). My problem is that I need to trust myself to keep track of it all and hopefully not let anything slip through the cracks of a busy day. I trust myself to do my best to get everything done (in a reasonable amount of time), but I can admit that I am human. On a busy day my memory isn't going to be fool proof ... so I make lists. If I don't get something done today I will revise my list this evening and it will be there tomorrow as a reminder that it hasn't gotten done yet. And that's okay. 

We all have busy lives; whether we are young parents juggling jobs and chauffeuring little ones or whether we are older and juggling jobs, a home, and caring for aging parents ... we ALL have things that require our attention. But the truth remains the same; there are still only 24 hours in a day and 7 days in a week. We will still only accomplish as much as time and ability (and sleep) allows for. My husband and I have been in the midst of a month-long backyard landscape overhaul. Out with the old and in the new; twenty years in a house will do that. We looked at the next step in our project and realized we had a small window of non-90 degree weather for a 48 hour period, so we tackled planting 19 shrubs! Trust me there were moments when we looked at each other's sunburned faces and dirty knees and thought, 'We're done! We can't do any more today.', but then we pushed ourselves and got it done and guess what? Today the temperature is back to 90 degrees and this stage of our project is complete.

It's okay to push ourselves when we're close to giving up; when it's the last two miles of a marathon, when three out of four walls are freshly painted, when we only have one more store to go in to finish up the Christmas shopping, or when you only have a week left of a medical treatment. When you set your goal and you see the finish line on the horizon, dig deep and just go for it. You are almost there! You've got nothing to lose and everything to gain. 

When is the last time you pushed yourself to accomplish something big? 

What was it and how did it go?


Wednesday, July 4, 2018

Appreciating the Fourth of July

Here we are ... the morning of the Fourth of July. Many of you will have the day off of work, but many will not. There will be retail stores open with BIG sales taking place and restaurants serving a variety of BBQ'd meats. There will be police officers, firefighters, EMTs, doctors and nurses working on our behalf and for that we should all be thankful.

How will you celebrate your Fourth of July holiday? It's already sunny and warm and we have another heat advisory in place. If you're outside today will you slather on some double digit sunscreen or perhaps grill something tasty on the BBQ? Will you ride your bike around the block, take a dip in the pool, or take a ride on a boat and watch the sun glint off of the waves? Did you put an American flag of some size (large or small) out in the front of your house to show your patriotism? Did you venture the traffic and head up north or decide to keep things simple and quiet and stay at home?

Aah ... so many choices. However you choose to spend your day I hope that you relax a bit. Try not to do chores today, but rather take the day to unwind and reflect. At some point today many of you will hear the Lee Greenwood version of 'God Bless the USA' on the radio. If you're like me you will still get chills when you listen to the lyrics.

Don't get so caught up in the firework displays, the family gatherings, or the commercial hoopla that you forget about the true meaning of the 4th of July holiday. Independence Day, also referred to as the Fourth of July or July Fourth, is a federal holiday in the United States commemorating the adoption of the Declaration of Independence on July 4, 1776. Many brave people gave sacrifices and paved the way for our freedoms, many of which we take for granted. Whether it is today or any other day, say thank you to a veteran for all they have done for our country and for us. Let them know they are not forgotten and that they are appreciated.

How will you celebrate the day?