Do you spread yourself too thin?

We all have things that we wish we could improve upon; the way we eat, the way we exercise, the way we handle stresses, maybe the way we react in relationships, or the way we do our jobs. At the same time, we all have some things that we do really well. Maybe you're great with your hands; saving you money on household or auto repairs (that's a HUGE thing, I know because my husband is great at making repairs around our house). Perhaps you are great with little kids. I know people who have a green thumb and have glorious gardens that show off their dedication. I know people who are musical, artistic, make others laugh, or are great listeners.

Sometimes being good at something can cause you to spread yourself too thin. Maybe people know how great you are with little kids so they're always asking (or expecting) you to babysit theirs. Maybe you have a hard time saying no, so you always say yes to help them out, but find that you don't have a lot of time left over for the things you want or need to do. 

My son used to have a pick up truck, which often led to people wanting him to tow things, move things, etc. for them. It became more of an expectation, rather than a friend helping out another friend. He had a big heart and always wanted to help everyone else so he would say yes, but when he needed something suddenly they were too busy to reciprocate. 

Sometimes people are great at their jobs; some people even make things look easy. How often does someone at your job ask you to cover for them and do a project because they know you'll get it done faster? Have you ever had someone in your department out sick or on vacation and suddenly others think they'll just drop all of that person's work load on to your desk to do besides your own? That can be really frustrating and overwhelming at the same time. It's great that think you're more than capable, but would also be helpful if everyone worked as a team and divided up the tasks more evenly so that no one person felt that way.

There are a couple of basic questions to ask yourself ...

1) Are you good at something and want to share it with others? There's certainly nothing wrong with that. It's good to find joy in giving our time and talents to others.

2) Do you have a hard time saying no to people? Is it because we want people to like us or appreciate us? Do we sometimes feel that if we say no, maybe they won't?

3) Do you set boundaries for yourself? Do you make sure you leave enough time for yourself?

It's great to have a talent. It's good to want to share that talent to help other people. It's wonderful to have a giving heart and think of the needs of others. But you don't want to spread yourself too thin. If you don't carve out some time for yourself at the same time then you can't give your best to anyone. The biggest thing to remember is to create a healthy balance. If you do that then there will be enough of you to take proper care of yourself and still have enough left over to see to the needs of others.

Where do you find in your life that you spread yourself too thin?

What is it about Christmas?

Today is December 7th which means we are less than 3 weeks away from Christmas. How are you doing? I ask because I care. I've observed lately that people tend to handle the holidays in different ways. Some people are overflowing with a sense of Christmas spirit, but there are others who are not. It's not a surprise, but Christmas can bring out the best, as well as the worst in people. Everyone handles it differently and that's o.k. (just a little sad I suppose). There are some who've had their trees up and decorated for a few weeks now (ok I admit our house is one of them), but there are others who completely dread the thought of putting up a tree and will literally wait til 2 days before Christmas. I honestly don't think it's because they're all so busy that they don't have the time. I think for some it's an inconvenience, but for others it could be a sad reminder that they might be alone at times during the holidays.

If you're behind in your cookie baking or decided not to send a Christmas card this year or haven't started your shopping yet or don't have a festive wreath on your front door ... that's o.k. But whatever you DO choose to do to celebrate your holiday, do it because it makes YOU happy. Do it because it makes YOU feel good. NEVER get in the habit of doing things for the wrong reason. Don't feel that you have to bake cookie trays for the neighbors or hand make your ornaments (unless you want to).  You should never stress yourself out over doing things because you think it's expected of you. No one has the right to 'expect' anything from you. If you want to scale things back a bit and go for a simpler Christmas then that's what you should do.

There are people who absolutely LOVE the Christmas season and all it represents. Christmas is about hope, joy, love and peace. It's NOT about new cell phones, new gadgets, new Barbies or skateboards. Don't get me wrong, I'm not against gift-giving when it comes from the heart. But I am against buying gifts because it's expected or it's merely for etiquette and reciprocity. I'll admit I even went shopping 'once' a few years ago on Black Friday. People's behavior can be an interesting thing to observe (especially when you're standing in a longggggg line). I saw people go into stores with very specific lists and were seriously looking for ways to make their hard-earned dollars go a little further. But I also witnessed people behaving like they were part of an African Safari ... for them I think it was more about beating the next guy in line and the adrenaline of the hunt. Ironically I've known people who have no desire to go to church on Christmas (they either think God doesn't exist or isn't important enough), but have no problem spending hundreds of dollars on gifts and signing the card 'from Santa'.

People are different. I suppose that's what makes us all unique in our own ways. My wish for you this Christmas season is that you find joy in your heart, that you're blessed with good health, and that you have someone to spend the season with. If you know someone who has lost someone this year and may be alone, consider inviting them over for Christmas dinner, or a cup of tea and conversation over a plate of Christmas cookies one afternoon. Perhaps shovel the snow for your elderly neighbor who is having a hard time but doesn't want to bother you by asking. For health reasons my mom doesn't get out of her apartment much. She doesn't have the space for us kids and grand kids to come over and have a meal, but she's also uncomfortable leaving her apartment. So we go visit her on Christmas Day and I bring her a fully prepared meal that she can enjoy after we've left. There are probably a million different solutions. The important thing is for us not to become so self-absorbed in our own worlds that we forget about those around us. 

I heard a story the other day about a woman who was standing in line at a fast food restaurant. Her order was minimal, but she handed the cashier a $20 bill and said 'just use the change to cover as many orders behind me as it'll go'. Now that's pretty cool!

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE !!!