Are You Evolving?

I never pretend to be an expert on anything and I am ALWAYS open to suggestions, whether that's on how to best prepare a recipe or how to be a successful parent. My husband and I have been married for 35 years, a great accomplishment (we think). We've both grown A LOT over the years. We've made mistakes and we've done a few things right. We've been supportive and we find that we are always evolving.

Together, over the years, we've built a home. We've had careers (a few different ones along the way). We've battled a disease. We've cared for our parents and we've suffered some loss. We also managed to establish a strong family unit. We have two amazing kids and have supported their interests, their hobbies, their goals, and their relationships. We served in school PTOs and marching band organizations. We've coached roller hockey and science olympiad. We've chaperoned field trips and we've transported mini fridges and 'stuff' to multiple dorm rooms and apartments. We've encouraged our children as they found their way and established careers. Being a parent has always been a big part of our identity.

We enjoy celebrating their milestones; the graduations, their musical performances, their jobs, a wedding, our 2 beautiful granddaughters, when the son who is a high school chemistry teacher by day and a woodworker by night sells a custom dining room table, and when the daughter who is establishing herself in her first big post-college job gets a box of personal business cards and can't wait to show you.

Yes, we love our kids, our daughter-in-law, and our granddaughters. We love encouraging them and watching them navigate life in their own way. We've also discovered a few things about ourselves and where we are in our own journey in life. We've gone from being a young married couple, to being parents, to being caregivers for our parents, to being almost empty-nesters, to being grandparents. All along we've run households and businesses. My husband and I love where we are in our lives and wouldn't trade it for anything.

We also try to keep a balance though, which on many days can prove to be challenging. We make our choices and we're happy with them. We also try to remember what our own hobbies and interests are. It's not that we've given anything up, we've just rearranged our priorities. Family and responsibilities will always come first; always have. I'll admit, some days we find it is harder to be selfish and more difficult to carve out time for us and our own interests. Don't get me wrong, I will always find a way to plant flowers in the summer and in the winter months when there is less outdoor projects I will make sure my husband finds time to work on his train layout. 

Sometimes, we just need to remind ourselves that it's just as important to make time for us, so that we can be in a better place when we make time for others. My husband and I belong to a small group. There are nine of us who gather once a month for dinner and conversation, we've done this for a number of years. Truth be told, it's one of our best nights of the month. We share a meal and stories of our kids, our grandkids, and remember back to how it used to be when we were all a little younger, lol. Just this week, one of the ladies in our group came home from teaching school that day (bless her for teaching kindergartners!) and fighting a cold and feeling a little worn out and opted to go back out in the rain to meet us for dinner. She said she reminded herself that she needed to 'make an effort to be social', but in the end was glad she did. She made a choice, one that was healthy for her.

Yes, I will never pretend to be an expert on anything (because I am not). I will readily admit that I am a work in progress and most likely will be for many years to come.

Where are you currently in your life journey?

Embrace Your Inner Child

This week has been all about the youth; my church hosted VBS (Vacation Bible School) and today was our last day. There's been laughter, Band-aids for scrapes so small you'd need a magnifying glass, excited voices, penny wars between the boys and the girls for charity, and even a few tears. Tears because they missed mom and tears because they didn't want to leave when it was time to go. I've seen just about everything this week. I've seen the 'crazy hair day' with hair that stood a foot above their head, heads that had at least 12 pony tails, and the hair that was spray painted in many colors. We've had the 'wear the best hat you have day' and in honor of our Kingdom Rock theme we had a day when the kids could dress up as princesses and knights. One boy melted my heart when he walked in with homemade armor (he covered every inch of his football helmet in tinfoil, as well as the large box we wore as a shield.) He had to of been up all night creating his costume. He really did a great job.

Finishing up a week with kids is exhausting and definitely can make one yearn for a little quiet time on the back patio with a tall iced tea, but it can also make you smile. This week has been busy and noisy in my office, but it was also a welcome reprieve that I look forward to each and every year. It's a time when I can embrace my inner child, create superhero invisible Band-aids for the little ones, occasionally hold a baby or two while the moms are busy with the older siblings, and recharge. It's a week that when we watch the TV news and see all the bad stuff going on the world  - gives me a glimmer of hope for the future. It's weeks like this that get kids away from their video games, has them making new friends, and has them learning life lessons that can help shape their lives.

It really has been a GREAT week!

It's Lucky My Children Survived

Last night my husband went with me to a baby department store (Buy Buy Baby) so I could pick out a gift for an upcoming baby shower. Granted, our children are 16 & 25 now, but WOW did I feel out of place! It felt like I'd stepped into a different time zone. My husband & I first walked toward the book section - because it was practically the only thing I recognized on the registry list AND because I love kids' books. Then I was amazed (followed by appalled) that 5" x 5" cardboard children's books ranged from $7-$12 a piece. Yikes ... when did the prices go up that high? My problem was that I couldn't narrow down my selection. Then I decided that 2-3 books just didn't seem like much, so we started looking at rubber coated baby spoons, teethers, and clothing hangers.

While I realize that the prices of just about everything have gone up over the years ... my mortgage, my health insurance, food, gasoline, tuition, etc. ... I looked around and noticed how much 'stuff' there was that could be bought. I mean, do people REALLY pay $13 for a small plastic pitcher to use when giving your child a bath? We used a recycled plastic margarine container. Do people REALLY pay $8.99 for a pair of practice plastic chop sticks so they can expose their toddlers to culture early on? When my son was in his toddler stage we were more concerned with hiding his vegetables in his applesauce - that didn't require any fancy silverware. Do people REALLY spend $20-$30 for rubber animal bath toys? We used the multi-colored Fisher Price plastic stackable rings. They worked great in both the playroom AND the bathtub.

It's funny ... when my kids were small our parents laughed at the high tech car seats we used and said it was a wonder we ever survived because they used to lay us down on the floor in the back seat of the car ... of course cars doubled as tanks back then. There's always that point when you find yourself saying things to your children that your parents used to say to you and you swore you'd be different and never repeat. I guess change is inevitable, although all change is not necessarily better. My husband often says that some things are always 'new and improved' because it keeps people working. Whether that's true or not I'm not sure. But with time comes change. That concept I'm afraid is unavoidable.

What was the most high tech thing we saw last night besides the ultimate baby monitors with flatscreen tvs? It had to be the motorized baby bouncer seat for $199.99. Our kids used the plain jane version that was powered off of their own squirming and giggles. Not this model though ... it has multiple speeds and moves and rotates the seat for you. I just wonder how the child (and the parents) would handle it if there was a power outage.

What's my motto for when we someday have grandkids? Less is more. Safety is one thing that can't be replaced, but watching your kids smile as they play on the kitchen floor with the wooden spoon, empty oatmeal container, and your pots and pans is priceless!