A Love-Hate Relationship

According to the calendar today is the official first day of autumn. Some people would say it's already been here for weeks since we've seen fall and Halloween decorations in the stores already; pumpkins, corn stalks, mums, and spooky spider webs. The coffee shops have already introduced their pumpkin spice flavors. The local cider mills are bustling with cider and donuts, petting zoos for the kids, and corn mazes. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE autumn. I love the color changes on the trees, the crisp mornings, and the fun of getting out my thick and cozy sweaters. But somehow it just doesn't quite seem like autumn this week. The temperatures here in the mitten have been above 80 all week, closing in on 90 today and tomorrow.

My flowers and plants are a bit confused; the leaves are turning brown but the flowers are blooming for a third time. The calendar and previous years tell me that towards the end of September it's time for me to deadhead my flowers, trim back my perennials, and start to prep my gardens for their dormant season. But this morning I had to work outside well before 7:30 a.m. in order to get my work done before it got too hot. That's right, it was already over 70 degrees when I woke up.

There is a part of me that is ready for summer to be over. I am tired of being too warm. I am looking forward to the cool breezes and the sweaters when I take an evening walk, but then it seems like autumn flies right by and we move straight into the winter months. While I may whine about the warm temperatures, I will whine even more when I have to drive on icy roads. I guess I just like to whine a lot, lol.

For all the people who love the cold or the warm temperatures year round, I take my hat off to you. I, on the other hand, look forward to the variety. Here in the mitten we have four seasons and for that I am thankful. I am not sure how I would do if EVERY month was the same. Just like shoes and a good haircut, change is a good thing.

What's your favorite thing to do in the fall?

Make The Time

How often does something happen and you wish you had more time? You or someone you care about gets sick. Your kids have grown up in what seems like the blink of an eye. There's a hurricane or a tornado. Time moves by so fast and yet we find ourselves wishing that we not only had more time, but that we had better used our time.

It is my nature to be a planner. I'm ALWAYS planning ahead; trying to be responsible and be prepared. I was a Girl Scout for many years when I was growing up, perhaps that is when the characteristic rooted. From an early age I became dependent on myself. If I wanted something done, I needed to make it happen. I learned not to depend on other people, but rather be in charge of my own destiny. Somewhere along the line though I became TOO good at being a planner. I can admit I often forget to make time for myself or the people I care most about. I tend to get caught up more in what will be happening next week and next month, so much so that I often forget to enjoy today. 

I need to learn that while it is important (and responsible) to be an organizer and an efficient planner, it is also important to learn to create a better life balance. I need to smell the roses more. I need to hold hands with my husband when we're taking a walk. I need to laugh more at witty puns and jokes until my sides ache. I need to embrace today more. If I manage to do that then I believe I will have the stronger stamina I need to tackle the responsibilities and obstacles that life will undoubtedly throw at me.

But how do I make that happen? I suppose being aware and acknowledging the problem is the first step. The next step? Great question. If you have the answer, I am all ears. I could remind myself over and over again to not worry as much about tomorrow and next week, but embrace the here and now. And if I can't remember I can only hope that my family and friends will be there to remind me, stick post it notes on my windshield, write me messages in the steam on my bathroom mirror, send me texts and emails ... whatever it takes for the proverbial 2x4 to hit me square between the eyes.

How balanced is your life? Can you relate or am I experiencing this dilemma all by myself? What helps you to keep an open perspective and to live more in the moment?

It's An Educational Anniversary

Milestones are important. They signify something monumental; the length of time you've been at the same job, the number of years you've been married, or how long you've been cancer-free. We tend to celebrate the big numbers ... five years, ten years, twenty years, fifty years. Any time you've been at something for a long time you deserve a proverbial pat on the back. Why? Because it signifies loyalty, commitment, accomplishments, and focus.

This month my husband and I are celebrating two big milestones. We will have been married for thirty-five years, which seems impossible to us (I suppose because we try to stay young at heart). We have two adult children, a wonderful daughter-in-law, and two precious granddaughters. I'd celebrate them all every day if I could. But this month we are also celebrating something else. For the first time in twenty-five years we are not driving someone to school, purchasing school supplies, attending a school musical concert or a Science Olympiad tournament. We didn't send anyone off to band camp, we didn't move someone into their college dorm, and we didn't help relocate a child off to another state. I didn't need to watch the advertisements for Bed, Bath, & Beyond or Target and I didn't make an extra trip to Sam's Club to buy granola bars or mac n' cheese in bulk. 

Yes, this is a monumental milestone for us; an educational anniversary of sorts. We've watched two children blossom into smart, talented, and God-loving adults. We'll continue to watch them find their way and their nitch in today's demanding world. We'll continue to give them both our love and our support. We'll always be just a phone call away and will always be willing to be a sounding board as they make their decisions and tough choices.

To all the parents out there who are buying new sneakers and a backpack for their elementary-aged child, we wish you luck as you and your child adjust to this week's new sleep schedule and routine. To the parents of the middle school aged kids ... brace yourselves ... they will go to school happy and come home feeling defeated because their best friend didn't say hello and someone else wore the same blouse to English class. To the parents of the high school students; pay attention to 'who' your child hangs out with, follow them on social media, and always remember that they already have enough 'friends', what they really need is for you to be a parent. For the parents that are carrying the mini-fridge up to the second or third floor of the dorm ... remember, lift with your knees! It will be easier at the end of the semester when it comes down. 

As our children hit their late teen years and even their early twenties, we always told them we would be there for them; as a sounding board, to help them study for an exam, to meet up for a burger when they were tired of cafeteria food, or to be their 'way out' of an uncomfortable situation. Trust me, when your daughter (or son) goes off to that one college party where no one was supposed to drink, but suddenly everyone was and they're worried about getting home we want them to know they can call home at any hour and we can help them work out a solution that will keep them safe and help them still be cool with their peers (which is important to them at that age).

So, here's to all the parents out there who are celebrating any sort of an anniversary or a milestone. Congrats to you for a job well done.

What life stage are you currently in and how's it going for you? Any words of wisdom for the rest of us?