Time is a commodity. We need more time to get more done so we can take the time we need for other things. It's a vicious cycle. But how do you feel when someone takes your time for granted? Do you feel used? Manipulated? Let down? If you feel any of these things you're perfectly normal.
Too often people will plan something with you, which means you've marked time 'open just for them' in your busy life. Your time is worth just as much as theirs. Then they cancel at the last minute or forget altogether as if it meant nothing. Apparently they don't understand that YOU could have been doing something else with your time, but you chose to make them a priority. In their little bubble of the world it was only about them; their needs, their wants, and their time. Anything that concerned you went right out the window.
When this happens (often repeatedly), do we learn our lesson? Do we share our disappointment with them? Do we think twice the next time they want to plan something with us? Sometimes 'yes', sometimes 'no'. We don't want or intend to be the doormat, but apparently we appreciate things like friendship and mutual respect more than they do.
This post isn't meant to be a downer; I'm just sharing some observations. I've always been a people watcher and one to try and understand why people do the things they do. No one wants to feel they're important only until a better offer comes along and they get pushed aside. Sure, there will always be unexpected delays in life due to traffic, a storm blows in, or a doctor gets delayed because of an emergency. We can all be understanding of situations like these. But I'm talking about the times when people make choices; sometimes selfish ones. It would be nice if these people stopped long enough to consider how their choices will affect other people. Sometimes deep inside (truth be told) we hope for karma, so they'll experience a little dose of their own actions and feel the disappointment. Some would learn from it and unfortunately some never will because they can't see past their own nose.
So what's the solution? Hard to say. I suppose we just need to pull our adult pants up and grow thicker skin. I know, easier said than done. The important thing to remember is that while we'll never be able to control the actions of others, we can always strive to make our own strong, independent choices that best suit our lives and our needs. The next time someone bales on lunch or a planned get together for no good reason and you feel inconvenienced ... tell them and then seriously think twice about accepting the next time. Make them wait for you. Hope that they'll learn and appreciate that your time has value too.
