Tuesday, February 24, 2015

When Is It Best To Let Go?

Have you ever noticed that some things take more effort than others? A workout ... a remodeling project ... even a relationship? So when do you decide how much repeated effort something is worth? It's a fine line to draw and often a difficult decision to make. I'm certainly not an expert, but my guess would be that if you have to continually nag a person, persistently pursue a desired end result, or the work being put into something is too much or too one-sided ... then it's most likely time to let it go.

That's the hardest part though; letting go. If it's a self-chosen project you can accept that you put your best effort in and maybe it's just not the right time or it's simply not meant to be. At least that's what I tell myself every time I try to lose the same 10 pounds (lol). But when it comes to human nature, all bets are off. If I live to be 100 I will still never be able to pinpoint why some people do the things that they do (or in some cases 'don't'), but then I'm sure people could (and probably do) say the exact same thing about me.
I recently listened to a sermon about forgiveness. It's something I've spent my whole adult life striving to do, but truth be told - I struggle. I've asked for forgiveness before and been lucky enough to receive it. I've been asked for forgiveness and I've given it. But, for me, the hardest scenario will always be that one relationship that you can't let go of; that one situation or memory that you simply can't get past no matter how hard you try. You convince yourself that if that one person ever finally acknowledges the wrongs you've been holding on to so tightly that you're ready to extend the forgiveness and move on - but they never do and you find yourself just not being able to let it go. Someone gave me some wise words once. They said, 'To forgive doesn't mean that you have to forget.' That took a while to sink in because I thought if I forgave it wiped the slate clean, as well as the memories from my mind. It's healthy to forgive, but I think it's also good to remember where you came from and how far you've come.
I read somewhere that the greatest sense of forgiveness is accepting the apology that was never offered. Oh how I wish I could master that one. I am working on it though. I am persistent and my intentions are good. The apologies most likely may never come and that's something I need to accept. I need to move on and I need to let it go.
How do you manage to get past your own roadblocks? When have you been able to let it go?

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